My 45th Year.

For me, it seems like my birthday is a start of a new year.  I feel like I've been given another year to make a difference and need to set some goals.  There is a place I want to be in a year from now so instead of starting on January 1st maybe it makes more sense to start on my birthday.

1. I'd like to read some books.  I have a stack of books that I've been wanting to read for about 10 years HA!  I used to be really good at setting my books goals and reading them and then, along came digital books and I'm not so good at that anymore.  I find that I need non-fiction books in paperback so I can make notes, re-read, and start over - something I struggle to do in digital format.

My plan is to read down my list and have my two books for each month in hand by the first of each month (some I already own and some I don't)

So here's my list for the year - 24 titles.  (2 books a month in case you needed help with the "new math" haha)
1. Listen, Love, Repeat
2. Wait and See
3. Uninvited
4. 5 Habits of Women who don't give up
5. Unglued
6. Taming the To Do List
7. The Mended Heart
8. What Happens When Women Walk in Faith
9. Keep it Shut
10. Am I messing up my kids?
11. Living So That
12. Breaking Busy: How to find Peace and Purpose in a World of Cracy
13. Choose Joy
14. Girl Meets Change
15. Hoodwinked
16. Own your Life
17. Raising Grateful Kids in an Entitled World
18. Simply Tuesday
19. Steadfast Love
20. The Fringe Hours
21. The Mingling of Souls
22. Women of the Word
23. Parenting: 14 Gospel Prinicples that can Radically Change your Family
24. In This Hosue we Giggle

2) Scrapbooking - I've finally back in my groove.  Attending crops, budgeting to get caught up, and, well, trying to catch up.  I'm currently working through 2014 and 2015.  I don't usually do two years at once but I accidently ordered photos from each year (I had Jan-March of 2014 but thought, later I was 2015 so I ordered April-June of 2015 - oops!). I've also started ordering pages from 2011 that are completed but I never ordered digitally.  Yes, that's three years I'm working on now HA!  So here's my basic goals for the next year.

1. Complete my nephews grad book by June 1st.
2. Complete all of 2014 and 2015 completely - all pages in scrapbooks; any memorabilia on pages and in the book; page protected and completed.
3. Go through all of my old scrapbooks and hopefully have them all completed - I say hopefully because I know I'm missing page protectors and I'm not sure if I can fit all of that in the budget throughout the year but I'm going to try.
4. Update the family albums with the boys year by year photos, sport photos ect.
5. I'd really like to have 2016 also done within this next year so that I will only be technically one full year "behind".
6.  Order one month of the digital pages each month AND order enough pages to put them into an album each month - this might be a stretch on the budget so, it might be order digital pages one month and scrapbook pages for this project the next month.
7.  Since this involves photos:  Print photos of each of our animals we've had since getting married and frame them; hang them in the bathroom alcove/hallway - I project I've wanted to do for a long time.
8. Get professional family photos take THIS summer.  It's been a few years and it is time.

3) Bible Study - I have a Bible Study book to do on Psalms.  Psalms is a very long book so for now, that is my goal.  When I finish this, I will pick something new at that point

4) The House.  I have some very specific goals for the house this coming year.  Sure there are things we'd like such as a new dishwasher, replacing the garage door, replacing the house doors but, those are some bigger ticket items.  Instead I just have somethings to accomplish.

1.  Paint the living room.  We've been able to replace our entertainment center and get some new lights.  So now we want to finish the update by painting and putting up some new artwork.  I also have a shelf to order for the scrapbooks (which in turn frees up storage space in the playroom!)
2) Replace the carpet and organize the playroom.  When our dog was so sick near the end of her life, the carpet in the playroom took a beating.  Not to mention it is already about 18 years old and . .. pink.  It's a tiny room so the cost is minor.   I also need to organize again and make that room more usable.
3) Update the boys room -just some simple organizing, changing out some artwork and creating some display shelves for their TDK belts and other sport trophies.  Once the playroom is done, I'm going to finish up some organizing in their rooms.  I kind of know what shelving I want to use in their room so they each have a very specific space.
4) The basement.   My goal is to finally clean the space out.  A couple of shelves, a couple of bins, and a huge trash pile should take care of it ;-)  We've talked to the boys already about the "playroom" downstairs and that we are going to turn it more into a Lego Space.  A space for the bins of legos that they use for fun, Some shelves for storage (there should be extras left from cleaning out what we already have) and a table for building.  This will clear up space in their bedroom for their favorite complete projects.

5.  Family - If we don't plan family events, they don't happen.
1) Camping - we currently have two dates on the calendar and are hoping to get one more in before summer is gone.
2) An anniversary get away - Darryl and I are hoping, planning and saving for a three day get away in August for our Anniversary.  Nothing big, just a few days away.
3) I have a few other things on my radar - A trip to Mackinaw, A trip to Chicago, a Short getaway over spring break in 2018 like we did this year (we combined it with our annual trip to celebrate when we got engaged). A trip to a hotel with a waterpark would be fun as well as a vacation somewhere new and fun!
4) The boys are getting older so some of it is just trying to be intentional and look for things that they would enjoy.  Going to Zoos, a Christmas Concert, Birthday plans etc.

6. School.
1) Online schooling is great but I still have to plan.  I want to work our schedule better so that we have more breathing room around holidays and also giving me at least one day a week to accomplish things I need to around the house
2. Summer review - we are focusing on a few key things.  One, handwriting.  Two, Keyboarding. Three, Math and Four, Reading.  We are wrapping up school right now and I plan to give the boys a few weeks off before giving them a summer schedule.  It will be very simple (because I don't like summer school either!) Just 20 minutes a day is my goal and then reading 2-3 days a week.


I'm sure I'll add some more to my list as I go along but for now this is a good start.

Grief - The Shadows

Almost a year ago I wrote a Blog Post about being silenced by grief.  One of the profound things about grief is that it morphs into different creatures.  Sometimes daily; sometimes weekly; or something it just pops up out of no where.

Most recently, it has struck me that grief brings shadows.

Losing someone that you love leaves an emptiness but as time passes by that emptiness moves aside and what is left behind are dark shadows, often lurking just on the edges of life.  Think about a photo with shaded  edges - where everything is darker and just a little blurry.  The photo may show a happy family, enjoying life but those blurred edges represent lose and hurt.

As year one passes by and year two begins, I find that a person goes from the overwhelming since of what was lost to the sense of what is missing or, maybe it is really of what is being missed.  Baseball games - especially the very fist hit of the season; birthdays, the rebuilding of an Amp (My husband was working on his recently, using tools my dad gave him and made the comment of, "I really missed your dad today because he would have loved being part of this process). See, those things are the blurred edges of the photo - instead of full joy, there is sadness mixed with joy.

Even as there are glimpses of sunlight through the trees; as happy memories are made; life events happen; really, "Life" moves on . .. there is still that corner of darkness that no one really understands unless you have lost someone who brought life and light to daily lives. I personally find myself more profoundly impacted now when someone dies because I know the feeling of grief and I also know what they face in the days ahead.  Just a week or so ago, Dr. Bradley, our vet, passed away unexpectedly.  My heart hurt for his family - the son who ran his office and worked with him daily; his wife of 50 years; his daughter and grandchildren.  Dr. Bradley was an amazing vet and I am saddened by the loss but I am more saddened for his family and their loss.  I know that hurt and it's not fun.

In the midst of all of those shadows, though, is light.  God gives us light; He gives us strength.  Yes, I still struggle with Sundays and holidays and missing my dads laugh and wisdom.  Yet, I love hearing my kids talk about Papa and all of his wisdom he shared with them in their short years; or seeing them recently use the tools he gave them as a gift on that last Christmas.  I love hearing others tell stories or share quotes or wisdom he shared with them.

Truth be told, Grief is hard.

Weekly Menu - The week with the first camping trip

We are facing too things this week - record temperatures and our first camping trip.  The good thing is I think the temps will drop before we leave!! Either way, cooking will be different this week than normal (What is normal anyway?)

Friday - Pizza - the boys have a choir concert so we are grabbing pizza before heading out.

Saturday - A family gathering at my moms

Sunday - More family fun at my moms

Monday - The boys are heading to VBS and have to be there by 5:45 so I'll feed them early; Darryl and I usually take advantage of this time and go to Applebees :-)

Tuesday - The boys again are at VBS (Last night!) so I plan on having Darryl bring home our favorite Tacos.

Wednesday - It's baseball!  Since we (Well, Darryl and I) have eaten out alot already, I'm going to put together quesadillas for a quick dinner before the game.

Thursday - Time for camping!  I plan on preppring Slow Cooker Shredded Beef for Sandwiches and Bacon Mac and Cheese (Something new).  I can throw both things in the crocks (yes, I'm taking two crock pots!) as soon as we pull into our campsite and they will cook while we set up.

Weekly Menu

For some odd reason I feel like I ran to the store way too much this past week.  Just little things that were needed.  Even yesterday, I ran to our local market to just grab bread thinking that is all that was needed to get us through the weekend until I got home and, apparently, a troll in the fridge drank almost the whole gallon of milk HA!  Good thing we have a dairy store in town with a drive -in so I can get milk without going into the store! Anway, this is the week were I try to use up the food I bought the last three weeks that we didn't end up using for various reasons.

Friday:  Hamburger Strogenoff, noodles and yeast rolls.

Saturday:  The boys are with my mom today while Darryl and I head out on a date day.  One of the many reasons we like having my mom near by for a few months - Darryl and I can get out for a date!

Sunday: Spaghetti with meatballs and garlic bread

Monday: Roasted whole chicken, crash potatoes, and veggies

Tuesday: Breakfast - pancakes, sausage, and fruit

Wednesday:  Baseball - we just grab and go (and sometimes get a hot dog at the game!)

Thursday:  I have zero inspiration thinking about next Thursday.  Leftovers? Pizza?  Taco Bell? Who knows!

Weekly Menu - The unofficial start of summer

It's here - Memorial Day weekend!  The unofficial start of summer.  Some  years, we've spent it cooling off at the beach; some years, we've spent it watching movies on a rainy day; there've been years with family and friends; and years of doing nothing!  This year is the year of painting.  We are going to paint our living room. . . .finally! So, here's the food plan

Friday: Tacos - I didn't make them earlier this week so we'll end the week with Tacos after Fit club

Saturday - We are going to paint; my mom is coming over and volunteered (for real) to work in my flower beds.  She's also bringing dinner - Sloppy Joes :-)

Sunday - Again, painting!  My mom is "cooking" for us again - I think we are doing KFC

Monday - Memorial Day!  We are taking the day off!!!  BBQ Port Chops on the grill, Potatoes/Sweet Potatoes in the crock pot, Mac and Cheese and Applesauce.  We'll have Cupcakes and Maybe some Strawberry shortcake too :-)

Tuesday - This is my "clean out the fridge/freezer week!  I have a whole chicken in the freezer so I'm going to cook that in the crock, make pasta, potatoes or beans and a veggie.

Wednesday - Assuming Darryl has practice, the boys and I will have dinner with my mom at her camper - who knows, we might even get our first swim of the season in depending on the weather.  Plus I haven't been able to spend much time over there yet due to rainy, cool weather and I enjoy the place :-)

Thursday - The boys have a baseball game so it will probably be corn dogs and Fries before the game.

Weekly Menu

My mom moved into her camper this past week and we had some close to 90 days so our menu kinda took a hit.  With that in mind there are some carry over meals from last week.

Friday: Steaks on the grill, crash potatoes, Rolls and veggie

Saturday: Either a campfire with Brats and Hot Dogs OR Ham and Cheese Pockets - all depends on the weather and weather we can do a campfire!

Sunday:  Chicken and Noodles, Rolls and Salad

Monday: The boys have a game so dinner has to be fast and easy.  I think we will have tacos

Tuesday: Pizza Sliders and Salad

Wednesday:  Darryl usually has practice so we will eat out

Thursday: Spaghetti and Meatballs, Green Beans, and Garlic Bread

Now, I know that sometimes we will eat at my mom's camper and sometimes at home but for me it is easier to just plan meals.  Some of these meals can easily  transported or moved to another week.  :-)

Weekly Menu

The official start of Summer is just a short time away.  The weather keeps playing tricks on us - this past Saturday we sat at the baseball field freezing but by Wednesday evening, it was hot hot and humid sitting at the game!

Here's the plan for the coming week.

Friday - The boys have Fit Club and I'm heading to a crop so a roast is going in the crock pot and there are Bob Evans mashed potatoes to go along with it - something easy for Darryl to do (He will also have an optoin to grab something instead since I need the leftover roast for Saturday anyway!)

Saturday - Easy French Dip sandwiches and Daddy Fries

Sunday - Mother's Day!  I acutally considered just getting KFC for dinner so there was no clean up on my part HA!  BUT the boys want me to make sure I get to have my favorites so instead Darryl's cooking steaks on the grill, I'm going to throw potatoes in the crock pot and we will have salad and rolls too.

Monday - The boys have a game so we keep things easy - Mac and Cheese and Corn dogs.

Tuesday - Ham and Cheese Pockets, crash potatoes, and salad

Wednesday - Chicken and Noodles, and Salad or veggie

Thursday - Easy Cheesy Chicken Enciladas, Rice, Beans, and Chips and Cheese.