Women Living Well. To read about week 1, just click HERE.
This weeks topic is - 5 Ways Media Could be Affecting your marriage. To read Courtney's full post just click the link above to Women Living Well and it should take you directly to her post. What I'm going to do is take her 5 topics and reflect on those areas in my marriage.
1) Time - Without a doubt, media items can eat away your time and that was last weeks topic. It was interesting because this past week/weekend I spent less time on my computer, facebook, blogs, etc than I have in quite awhile and, guess what? I didn't die ;-) To read more on this topic click the "here" above to read last weeks post.
2) Beware of Inappropriate Relationships on-line - yes, there are people that struggle with this area but this is also nothing new. There are several people that I attended church with over 10 years ago who met someone through an on-line resource and ended up leaving their familes for a "better life". Personally, the ultimate safety tool is to make sure your spouse has full access to every media outlet you use - my husband knows all of my passwords and goes onto my facebook site and/or blog often. I actually set up his facebook account for him so I know all of his stuff and usually read his messages for him since he seldom goes on it anyway :-) Courtney's take is to have no male friends on facebook - I haven't felt the need to do so. I have so many college friends that it has been great to reconnect with - I love it! With that said - most of the time, I'm also friends with their wife or, many people have one account for both people:-) The other thing, be cautious with what you post - don't post anything you don't want someone to read, talk about when they see you, or that someone can read into (which is the hardest part!) I post about the weather a lot :-)
3) Disrespectful Talk about Husband's on-line - Here's my point of view. I don't do it :-) I don't need to do it because my husband is wonderful. Seriously. Why would you even want to do that to your husband - how would you feel if he did that to you? So, when you are upset with your spouse, talk to only the two individuals that can resolve it - your spouse, and God - pray about it alot!
4) The introduction of P*orn compared to 10 years ago - Like Courtney, this is not a topic I have had to deal with - she gives a link if you are looking for some help. Again, make sure that you and your spouse have no secrets online - keep the computer(s) in an open area.
5) Looking at others live and growing discontent - This is so true of facebook and blogs . Isn't it amazing how perfect every one's lives look like when you read posts and status updates? It is so easy to grow discontent when you see someone else's vacation photos, photos of new clothes, furniture, cars or even their house. Those feelings can cause discontent feelings with your spouse - maybe you feel that someone else has it better than you do. Those feelings can really cause a rift in your marriage relationship! I personally know people who have discontinued the use of Facebook due to these very reasons or because they have been hurt by what people have said online. I will admit that sometimes I'm amazed at what people post and how they use a status as a way to get back at someone or to make a point. I have not had any problem with this but I know people who have and being bullied is never fun, no matter how old you are :-) If you find you are discontent, take time to talk to your spouse about it, ask them to help you. Maybe you just need a day away or a date night. The biggest thing that I have learned is that the grass is not greener :-) As I look at a friends pictures of a new house, I have to remind myself of past conversations of unhappiness that they struggle with or as I see or hear discussion about the latest trip or shopping experience, I also remember the complaints about a spouse who doesn't really care. It isn't an easy lesson to learn but I work on not comparing my spouse, my children, myself or my "life" to what others have - because mine is so much better :-)
I have to admit - reading the above post it doesn't talk a lot about marriage specifically but if you keep those five areas in focus and keep them in the right priority - your marriage won't suffer; it will get stronger.
Thanks for reading :-)