21 Days of Prayer Challenge - Day 14 - Goodness

This was posted in the leader guide for this topic - I thought I would share it!

What are you aiming for? When your boys disobey, disrespect, are unkind. When they seek to understand what's important. When they notice girls, cheat in school or fight on the bus. When they're seeking marriage, failing in school or deciding whether to have sex for the first time or not … what are you aiming for?

I want their hearts. No behavior modification or fad parenting of the day. No, I want the hearts of our boys,because

God wants the hearts of our boys. I'm aiming for the heart. But how?

"Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which

outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people's bones and all uncleanness. So you
outwardly appear righteous to others, but within you are full of hypocrisy and lawlessness."
(Matthew 23:27-28, ESV)Looking at parenting through the lens of these verses has changed everything for me. You see I was a Pharisee. Boy was my cup clean on the outside. But on the inside? On the inside my cup was filthy, full of all uncleanness.

I had everybody fooled, even myself. I believed that if I did good things, it made me good. Actually, it's probablycloser to the truth to say I believed that

if I didn't do bad things, I wasn't bad. I didn't know that no one is good. I

didn't really understand that everyone sins. And I didn't understand the depth of my own sin until the Lord

showed it to me.

Question:

In our efforts to raise our sons are we teaching them that if they do good things they are good?

Righteous even

? If we teach them that being good is all it takes, if our discipline and training focuses on their

behavior,

how will they know they need a Savior?

Are we raising little Pharisees? Or are we raising Godly men with a heart for God? If a Godly son is your goal,

you must aim for the heart. Because unless the heart is changed--touched--the behavior will stay the same. It

might look a little different, morph some as they grow. But behavior is always a symptom of the state of the

heart. What's in the heart, comes out.

"Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks." ~Matthew 12:34

Ask yourself these questions:

•

What parenting tools have I been using that only focus on changing behavior and not the heart? Am I

willing to lay them down even if they produce what looks like a good child?

•

Reaching a child's heart takes time. Behavior modification is much faster! Am I willing to change things

about my life so that I have the time to invest in the hearts of my children?

•

Most importantly: Am I willing to submit my own heart to God and allow Him to mold me from the

inside out?

Shepherding our boys is not for the faint of heart friends! Once a week or more I'm tempted to just throw it all

out the window (including the boys … ) and take the easier path. So what keeps me going?

I want their hearts. Just like my Heavenly Father wants mine.


Today's challenge - pray the 10 prayers in the chapter for today - on Goodness!

Deep Cleaning 101 - The Bathroom!

The zone (per Flylady) for last week was the Bathroom plus one extra room.  I focused on the Bathroom.  Here are a few lovely shots of our bathroom:

(excuse the dog toy in the bottom corner - that thing gets worn around the house like a mink shawl by my kids - it is true, your kids really just need dog toys!)

This is only one side of the bathroom, we do actually have a shower and a toilet but, no one likes to see a toilet :-)  That stand in the corner - that is the "wash hands and brush your teeth" stool.  Some day I might actually get a regular stool for my kids to stand on . .. by then, they won't need it!

My little house was built back in the early 1900's and therefore, has very little storage space that can be named "closets".  When a previous owner updated the house, they added a very wonderful storage closet in the bathroom.  The thing is huge.  I love it because it truly meets so many needs.  When we re-did the bathroom a year ago, I worked on organizing the cabinets . .. but as you can tell by the first picture,  it quickly gets out of hand so one of the first things I do when I deep clean the bathroom is open the cabinet doors and look!  I take about 5 minutes and tidy up whatever has gotten out of place.  The bottom shelves I use to store my over sized kitchen items and all of our table clothes and cloth napkins.  (I've learned that tablecloths and kids don't mix . .. they think they are way too fun to pull of the table!) The top shelves hold our toiletries, cleaning supplies, and games.  There is also a full length cabinet (no picture . .. ) that is our coat closet and that closet holds my vacuum and steam mop. 

So, what is my cleaning plan?  Here it is!
1) Open up the cabinet doors and take a quick 5 (or less) to put things back in the right spot.  I also look at my stash of toiletry items and do a quick inventory . It is amazing how many tubes of toothpaste I end up with at the end of a month!
2) Wipe down the flat surfaces - the rolling cart (which is my vanity table), the counter top and sink.  While doing that I also wipe down any outlet covers that are in the middle of the wall and I wipe down the medicine cabinet mirror inside and out.
3) Fixture wipe down - I clean the toilet and shower.  During deep cleaning, I use Iron out and a sponge to really scrub the shower.  We have very hard water and, despite our water softener, after a month, there are rust stains starting to build up.  (On a side note - they have liquid Iron out now and it is so much easier to use than the powder!!)
4) Dusting - I take time to wipe down any pictures on the walls and knick knacks
5) The Floors - first, I vacuum, than I swiffer with my swiffer vac, next I do a quick swipe with the steam mop and finally, I get down on my hands and knees and mop the floor with pin sol.  While down there, I clean the bottom half of the toilet, wipe off baseboards, cabinet doors and the front of the tub. I wash the bathroom rugs sometime during the week too. 
6) Windows - I wipe down the blinds and usually clean the windows
7) Odd Things: Curtains I wash once or twice a year -usually spring and fall; I use Turtle Wax on the shower walls every 2-3 months to help make it easier to clean; outsides of windows - done once a year by my husband :-)

All of that cleaning (well at least 1-6) takes about 45 minutes totals during the week. Really, my bathroom gets basic cleaning once a week during my Weekly Home Blessing since it really needs it so doing deep cleaning really isn't that bad. 

What is a Weekly Home Blessing?  Basically you take no more then an hour and "bless your home" - basically doing quick cleaning.  Every one's list is different but mine includes:  Dusting without moving anything (just where it shows); Vacuuming the middles - not moving furniture, toys, or even kids (yes, I will vacuum around them if they are playing); swiffering the hard floors and running the steam mop over those as well to get rid of the sticky spots; cleaning the toilet and wiping down the shower.  (Plus, I swish and swipe in the bathroom daily which means - I wipe down the sink and mirror and "swish" the toilet plus wipe down the seat every day).  So yes, the bathroom almost gets a full clean every week (in case you ever visit, you'll know it's clean!)

Now, you might be wondering about that "extra room".  Flylady rotates that extra room or sometimes let you pick . .. whether it be a kids room, the laundry room, the den - whatever needs it.  For me, I attach one kids room to the bathroom zone and the other to the master bedroom zone BUT it is really hard to deep clean a kids room when they are hanging on standing by you the whole time.  It just so happens my kids are going to the grandparents soon so I'm waiting to deep clean their rooms until they are gone :-)  Their rooms really don't get that dirty yet since they really only sleep in there!   If I had a laundry room upstairs or a mud room - I would clean that on this week too!!

Next week . .. The Master Bedroom, Master Bathroom (if you have one .. which I don't), and Master Closet (no matter the size!).

21 Days of Prayer Challenge - Day 13 - Kindness

I apoligize for the short and sweet posts but . . it has been a busy weekend! 

So for today, take time to pray through the 10 prayers in the chapeter on Kindness!

Have a wonderful day :-)

Our Father's Day Fun

We had a fabulous day for Father's Day and I pulled off some cute little surprises for my hubby. 

To begin with today, I cooked Darryl (and the rest of us) a wonderful brunch.

We had a ham and cheese quiche, cheesy hash browns, Cream Cheese danish, and Bananas.  I plan on sharing the recipes later this week.  They are all very yummy. 

I had worked all week on a great gift idea for Darryl - and it was perfect!  Check this out :

Yes, those are Hamburgers and French Fries . .. well, kinda :-)  They are made out of cupcakes, brownies, and sugar cookies!  The "4 pack" is filled with Darryl's favorite candy :-)  Wait . . see that rolled paper . . .THAT is his real gift!  (Don't worry, I'll share the "hows" of everything I made in a "Crafty Crafty" post on Tuesday!)

So what was his real gift?  How about this!!!

Sure thing!  Several months ago, I saved my pennies and was able to purchase tickets to see our local baseball team.  (It makes it nice when both kids get in free!!)  This was the first game for either of the boys and it was a lot of fun. 

We had such great seats and, to make things better, the family sitting next to us, left after 2 innings due to their little one needing a nap so we had 3 extra seats to spread out.  Both boys clapped when the crowd clapped and seemed to really enjoy the whole game.  We made it much further into the game then I ever thought they would - we managed to stick it out through 5 1/5 innings!  With a 2 1/2 year old and a 1 1/2 year old, I would say that is very good :-) 

Once we left the game, we went to Sonic for the first time ever!  It was fun going to the drive-in restaurant and, I have to say, that the drinks are great.  I got a Cherry Slushie and it was fantastic. 

It was a really fun day for all of us!

One last set of pictures that will be a new tradition for us on Father's day.

A friend of mine takes pictures of her girls every year wearing shirts of their dad.  It is so adorable to see how they grow each year.  I wanted to do this same thing with my boys (but I didn't think they would enjoy wearing a dress LOL) so we pulled out some shirts today and snapped a few photos.  Trying to get one of them together was not really in the cards but they posed for some individual shots.  It will be fun to compare pictures every year until those shirts finally fit!

Happy Father's Day!

The 21 Days of Prayer Challenge - Day 12 - Patience

This post is short and sweet again today - the challenge is to pray the 10 prayers in the chapter on Patience :-)

I pray that each of you is enjoying Father's day today!!

Happy Father's Day!!

Happy Father's Day Pops!!  Yep, this is my dad (aka as Pops).  He's a pretty great guy, if I do say so myself. Besides being the best dad in the whole world, he's also a great pastor, and a FANTASTIC Papa!  I think I'm pretty lucky to have been blessed with such a great man as my dad!!  I could list all of the wonderful things he does but . .that would take years but here's a snapshot: He fixes anything I ask him to and paints rooms for me, even when I pick out the wrong color; he drills holes for my cabinet handles (and even left a special reminder on one of the cabinets . . .so I wouldn't forget who drilled them LOL); he calls me sometimes and practices his sermon on me (whether I want to listen or not :-) ); he wore an outdated, extremely wide Snoopy Tie long after anyone should have, all because every Father's Day for years I asked him if he was wearing that tie; he makes sure that my brothers and I are all well taken care of by picking up the dinner tab, filling up gas tanks, or going to Lowes/Home Depot with us to buy one thing and comes home with 10 . . .and he does this even when we don't always say thank you!  So with all of that said . .. THANKS dad for always being the one to make sure that everything is where it needs to be and that we always have what we need.  I love you TONS and so does your son-in-law AND your two grandsons!!  And, I think Josh has hit the nail on the head when he says  .. ."Papa, Church?" - he already knows that Papa and Church are two very important things!!!

To me Father's day is a day to honor our fathers . . .my husband is not my father :-) LOL  BUT with that said, I do have a few things up my sleeve for my husband . .. from his boys of course!  I'll share it all later, after the fact, since he sometimes reads my blog. He is already scratching his head because I made him stay out of the kitchen for awhile and he keeps asking me what I was doing (hehehehe) . I just told him, sometimes, questions are better left unasked. 

The 21 Days of Prayer - Day 11 - Peace

Oops - I forgot to post this on Friday night . .. sorry for the delay for those of you that are following this challenge!!

Thoughts from Laura Lee Groves

(Author of

I'm Outnumbered! One Mom's Lessons in the Lively Art of Raising Boys)

Most of us are actually outnumbered by the males in our households--for me, it’s been five to one! But it’s not just the numbers that bring that sense of being overwhelmed. For the mom of just one baby boy, a baby’s demands can be overwhelming. For the mom of a toddler boy, the constant busyness, discovery, and rebellion can wear mom down. For the mom of a school age son, making sure he’s keeping up with learning and homework can be taxing and worrisome.  For the mom of a middle schooler and teen boy--oh, there’s so much to worry about!

But you’re not the first mom. It’s pretty clear to see we’re in this thing called mothering together. That means others feel--or have felt--that same need for peace.

What can you do to help yourself?

First, find someone to confide in--

someone who’s walking your same path, or someone who has walked it before. My biggest support when my boys were small were two boy moms whose sons were a few years ahead of mine. Find someone you can be honest with about the trials of mothering.

If at all possible, step away from the demands--

for an hour, for an evening, even for just fifteen minutes. Let someone else hold the baby or chase the toddler for just a bit, and don’t feel guilty. If your son is school age, find a project or lesson that Dad or big brother or someone else can step into in your place, and take a break. Or just step back and give your son a little more responsibility--see if he can handle it. We too often see ourselves as indispensable when our sons can do some things on their own.

You can help yourself by shifting your perspective as he grows.

We have to accept that they’re growing and changing, and if we resist that, it just makes everything more difficult. As he grows, do whatever you can to stay close to him. When he hits those middle and teen years, keep him talking. Do the one thing you know he enjoys doing, even if it’s not your favorite. Build a bridge, strengthen the connection between the two of you. Stay close but don’t smother, and love unconditionally. You’re poured a lot into your son. The proof of the pudding comes

as he spreads his own wings and tries them. Sometimes he has to take a hit before he realizes it’s “real world time.” Don’t save him every time, or he’ll never be the man he was created to be.
And last--but most importantly--pray for him and for your relationship.

Pray for the faith to let go, for confidence in your and his abilities. The One who made you and loves you is waiting to give help and comfort and peace all along the way. No, He doesn’t take away the pain and the frustration, but He gives us a way to deal with it. When we begin to think about ourselves and our children in His scheme of things, we begin to think big. We see ourselves and our

children in His plan and our “today” perspective changes.

What’s important for me to remember

Motherhood has many demands, but I can’t do everything. In fact, I don’t need to. There’s One who knows better than I do and He’s waiting to catch me and my son when we stumble. He gives me grace to do all I can each day … then His grace provides for all I didn’t get to, as well. It’s hard to believe anyone loves my son more than I do. But He does. Knowing that, I can “Glory in His holy name; let the hearts of those who seek the Lord rejoice. Look to the Lord and his strength; seek his face always.” (Psalm 105:3,4)

And I can help myself to peace--from above.

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on Thee; because he trusteth in Thee."

~Isaiah 26:3 (ASV)

Today's challenge is to pray the 10 prayers from the chapter on Peace :-)